Tuesday, 2 June 2015

Love is a waste of time!

April 31, 8:30 pm

A call from her, which off-course I never expected. My voice chocked a couple of times. She cheered me up.

Conversation over phone.

FAIR-N-LOVELY: "Hey, I'm leaving tomorrow. Agar mai Kolkata gai, toh tu mujhse milega naa? You will take me to roam around the city."

ME: "You don't even meet me up here, and you want me to believe in your words?"

FAIR-N-LOVELY: "I am not lying, trust me, if I go we will meet."

ME: "I trust you."

May 2, 7 pm

Phone beeps. A couple of messages from KUNNU-MAMA. First one informed me that my ex was inquiring about me. I felt satiated, and even more happy. The second one blew my expectations away and tore me up. I asked him to forward me the texts she sent. He replied back with a volume of screenshots.

Conversation over Whatsapp.

FAIR-N-LOVELY: "I met him. I just wanted that only. Mujhe jo sahi laga, wahi kiya maine."

KUNNU-MAMA: "Woh sahi sai behave karta..tu uss sai sahi se baat karti bas..uss se aage ka plan puchti"

FAIR-N-LOVELY: "You know that right you cannot be friends with your ex? And main usse agey kabhi milungi hi nhi."

See the contrary in these two conversations? She gives me HOPE. A fake hope, and I keep building my expectations on top of it. And then suddenly I realize, it was all a lie. These all time around, she morphed herself, and kept toying around with my feelings. WHY?

Did I ask you to call me? No. You still kept on calling me. We didn't talk for months, still you wanted to talk to me on that very last day. I stated clearly, if I am there it won't look good. Still, I had to give in to your endless desire to meet me on the final day. I dressed up neat. Finally, we were gonna talk face-to-face after I-lost-count-how-many-months! Tension cribbed in, every moment. How are you gonna react? Am I looking good? Should I take a Cadbury Silk? You see Miss, everything was inside my head. I walked to you, with one last desire, atleast one selfie of us together (call it as a symbolic representation of our friendship maybe). But you had DIFFERENT mindset.

5 seconds right? If I am not wrong we had a conversation of hardly 5 seconds. A hello, a handshake, followed by the bomber.

FAIR-N-LOVELY: "I am feeling awkward. Can I leave?"

You invite me, and you interrogate such a baseless question? Women are the most confused living being. Somebody said, rightly said. A disheartened heart returned back to the hostel. Damn!

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